bismillah....dengan nama Allah Yang Maha Penyayang lagi Maha Mengasihani
its quite a long time i did not visit my blog...huhu..busy la kata kan....
sebenarnya banyak cerita yang ingin diluahkan di sini... tapi, tak tahu macam mana nak mula.. hanya mengarang dalam hati, nak tulis tapi berfikir banyak kali..
Esok dah start posting baru.. posting Public Health and Preventive Medicine ( PHPM) and we are going to do health carnival..yeay!!!.. Time moves very fast actually... dah masuk bulan November dah... tup tap tup tap... dah habis 2 posting sejak berada dalam tahun 4 nie... time is very precious.. every second every minutes.. and what did I do with my time?? terisi dengan baikkah??
As I grow older and older... I realize, that is a lot of things i did not know..too much.. I try to do my best in everything i did.. we do not know what will happen tomorrow, but we have to plan.. that is my principle. People surrounding put high expectation to me... especially my family. They trust me very much, hope one day i can change our family circumstances for a better life.. Everytime I hear my mom's voice through phone, I felt disheartened... am I able to achieve her expectation?? Can I pass all the exams to be a doctor in two years time??
That is why I felt so frustrated for the last medicine posting examination.... I never failed before.. I did what I supposed to do as a medical student; studying, going to the ward, follow ward round.. and I restrained myself from watching movies for the whole 8 weeks posting... but then.. Allah knew better.. Kita hanya berusaha, kejayaan atau kegagalan itu hanya Allah yang tentukan... Banyak kali aku beristighfar, minta ampun sebab fikiran tak tenang, tak boleh nak terima....you can cry, but after that you have to be strong again.. never lose hope... and i just raised this issue during our 'usrah' with final year senior... and she said to me,.." Allah itu maha adil,. Allah lihat usaha kita, cuma dia tak izinkan lagi.. Allah nak uji sejauh mana kita boleh terima ujian ini setelah Dia bagi kita nikmat..sama ada kita masih menaruh harapan padaNya lagi ataupun tidak... Dia pasti akan gantikan dengan yang lebih baik.. jangan sesekali buruk sangka dengan Allah..'' Dan.. aku berasa amat terharu.....
p/s : DUNIA BUKAN SEGALA- GALANYA....
