i am sorry

i think i do not want to write this post yet.... but i have to. i could not bear this feeling anymore..

if i did wrong, please tell me...
so that i realized my mistake...
if i did something unpleasant, please do correct me..
because that how true friend is...

is it by ignoring me please you very much?
maybe yes... because you have many friends surrounding you that you can go to...

be friend because of Allah, is it this way?
is it good to let your friend disheartened without you know it?

or maybe this is my fortune...
be too quite..too passive even people did not know how my feeling is
that trying to keep smiling in any circumstances..showing them i have no problem at all
how hypocrite i am
trying to please other people but did they even appreciate it?

when i think deeply..... i was just like my mom.... :'(
it is ok, if i am sad, i always have someone I can rely on..Allah..
and when my mom sad too, i will tell her to ask from Allah..

'' sesungguhnya Allah itu kuat, sekiranya kamu inginkan kekuatan, carilah Allah''

6 weeks left~~~

assalam........

long time not view this blog... last tulis was few months ago.. ingat lagi masa tulis post tu there is still 195 days left for pro exam... and now, it only 6 weeks left.. masa sangat cepat...

currently in my last posting, obstetric & gynecology... only 3 weeks left to finish this posting. posting yg sangat busy, nak kejar procedure semua plus nak revise other posting... tak sempaaat.... rasa macam nak nangis jew.. time2 nak exam ni macam2 pulak masalahnya,.. pressure from people surrounding make me so scared to face the exam.. am i really ready to be a doctor?

but, i always realize Allah is there for me... even dalam usrah, akak murabbi selalu pesan letak Allah pada kat tempat yg teratas, berdoalah pada Allah kerana sesungguhnya Dialah yang akan menentukan samada kita berjaya atau tak... Allah yang pegang hati manusia, insyaAllah... Allah akan tolong kita lalui waktu tersebut dengan tenang. Berjaya dalam exam is not the only main aim, tapi redha Allah yang penting.. and i always bear that thing in my mind ........

day to day as a student life, it was very interesting and fascinating... meeting a lot of people with different altitude give some hint to me what to be in the future.. some of them very nice, very friendly to students like us, appreciate our presence, willing to teach us... that the person that i want to be.... in my case right now, being posted in obstetric ward with full of emotion always down my mood... however, i have chance to meet a few people that helpful and making me comfortable to talk with. rarely to see in other department though...

and...that is life.. when we have a stop in one place, meeting with people there, having good rapport and relationship until we need to leave it... we cannot expect to have similar environment in other place .. me too become easily emotional  recently...don't know why.. maybe because of coming exam..

moga Allah redha perjalananku dalam menuntut ilmu... for next post, i hope i can update my life as an HO... amin ....